Things You Would Never Hear the Swat Kats Say or Do!
(or at least we hope not)

This is an idea that I have been toying with for a while. When I stay up too long I start getting crazy, twisted ideas. "Wouldn't it be funny if T-Bone said this or if Razor did that?" Well I finally organized my psycho thoughts into something presentable, but be warned some of them are kinda long. I also had a lot of help and inspiration from BlackRazor, THANX! Half of these are his too.

I rate this page ESKIMO for Extreme Swat Kat Immature Opinions.

-Chance: LOOK! The Teletubbies are on! YAY!

-Razor to T-Bone: I'm here to pump... you up!

-T-Bone whining to Felina: He hit me ::points at Razor:: big bully, WAHHHH!

-Callie to Chance at garage: I'm here for my inspection.
Chance: Sure hop on up
Callie outraged: No I mean my car!
Chance: oh we can do that too.
( I got that one from my math teacher- DON'T ASK!)

-Dark Kat singing to kreeplings: I love you.... you love... we're all one big evil family!

-T-Bone: Razor get your tail up here!
Razor: It's coming!

-Jake singing: I'm too sexy for my tail,... too sexy for my tail,... so sexy it hurts!

-T-Bone singing to remains of TurboKat: Near, Far, were ever you are... my heart will go on!

-Jake: You think you humans need hair spray...!

-Razor to Dark Kat: Don't hate because I'm cute!

-Razor at weapons console in TurboKat: Crud! It CRASHED!
T-Bone: You want me to crash??!!

-Jake: Chance could you boot my computer?
Chance: with pleasure ::Chance karate kicks computer and reduces it to rubble::
Jake: CHANCE WHAT DID YOU DO THAT FOR??!!
Chance: well you said boot it
Jake: ::crying:: my computer!!
Next week...
Jake: Chance can you boot my computer?
Chance: sure ::tries to kick it but before he can a laser appears::
Computer: Step away from my CPU or you will have one sorry tail meat head!
Jake: YAY! My new insulting security system works!

-T-Bone getting high off the TurboKat's fumes

-Fixing Callie's car several hours after it was brought in

-Chance singing Bobby Darin's 'Dreamlover' to mirror

-Callie contacts the Swat Kats and gets:
Thank You for calling the Swat Kat's hanger... we are currently unavailable right now,
Press 1 if the city is getting attacked by giant robots
Press 2 if you are getting attacked by Dark Kat
Press 3 if you are getting kat napped by the Metallikats
Press 4 if you are getting kat napped by the Pastmaster
Press 5 if your planet is getting attacked by aliens
Press 6 to talk to Razor
Press 7 to talk to Meat hea.. I mean T-Bone
Press 8 if you.....
Callie: AAAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

-Razor accidentally calls T-Bone 'Rib eye steak'

-T-Bone buying a six-pack with Chance Furlong's credit card

-::phones rings in garage, Caller ID registers FERAL 433-02092::
Chance: Hey Sexy! (expects Felina)
Commander Feral: FURLONG IS THAT YOU??!!
Jake from inside garage: Chance, who is it?
Chance: It's for you!
Jake walks up to phone: Jake Clawson speaking
Commander Feral: CLAWSON!!?? HOW DARE YOU MAKE FUN OF MY SEX APPEAL!!
::Jake's eyes get wide::
Jake into phone: uhhh n..n..no sir. I didn't mean.... what I meant to say is uhh ...
::Chance slowly tiptoes out of room::
Jake puts paw over receiver: CHANCE!!!

-Chance watching 'Fists of Fury' instead of Scaredy Kat

-::Jake is in the garage working and hears 'Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy' and walks over to investigate. As he get closer he feels the ground beneath him shake. Walks in and sees Chance jumping around in a tutu trying his best follow the lead actor::
Jake: Sweet Mother of God ! Chance WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? Are you high on the TurboKats fumes again?

-Feral: Now were did I put my stash of crack, pot, majauania, vodka....

-Razor suddenly regrets saying 'I want to see stars'. T-Bone takes it literally and punches Razor
Razor: ooooo look at all the pretty stars ::falls  to ground unconcience::

-Felina: You want me to go out there!?!?! Into all that mud!?!? But I just washed my fur!!!!!!!!

-Razor: Computer! EJECT disk
T-Bone: What? Eject you? OK what ever you say!
Razor: T-BONE! Nooooooooooooooo....
T-Bone: bye Razor, catch up with you later!

-::Swat Kats chasing Dark Kat::
T-Bone: CRUD! He's getting away! Can't this jet go any faster?
Razor: It would if you would go on a diet!
T-Bone: I AM NOT OVERWEIGHT!!
Razor: Are too!
T-Bone: Are not!
Razor: Are too!
T-Bone: Are not!
::Dark Kat nukes city::
Razor: Are too!
T-Bone: Are not!
Razor: Aww Crud! Dark Kat just nuked the city! This all your fault T-Bone!
T-Bone: MY FAULT! You started it!
Razor: Did not!
T-Bone: Did too!...

-Razor fixing TurboKat with swiss army knife, paper clip, and lame excuse that he forgot his tool box

-Chance: Hey Jake, why did you choose 'Razor' as a callsign?...do you like to shave or something?
Jake: Well why did you choose 'T-Bone'?... you like to eat alot or something?
Giant: well isn't that obvious? (sorry I had to put that in there)

Ok thats all I can think of for now. I'll try to come up with some more. If anyone has any ideas I'd be happy to put them up, but please, keep it clean kats (yeah, I know some of mine are kinda questionable, but, hey its my page!)